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Week 1 Winners And Losers

Posted by LOTGK on September 5, 2007

The NFL 2007 season opens tomorrow night with the Colts playing the Saints. Each week the Grassy Knoll Institute sports experts will pick the winners for each NFL game. And why we picked them. Let’s get right to the predictions.

Week One Predictions:
Falcons/Vikings
Vikings start Tarvaris Jackson, Bobby Wade, Sidney Rice, and the new Venus De Milo hands award winner, Troy Williamson. Falcons start Joey “At least I’m better than Heath Shuler” Harrington.
Vikings win.

Eagles/Packers
Mcnabb states he is 90% ready to go. Favre as well. Not in game ready terms, but in please retire already terms.
Eagles Win.

Patriots/Jets
Randy Moss is ready to play. Cherish that moment Pat’s fans. Next week, he may not be. Course, Brady is now playing for child support payments. “SNAP!” Was that Pennington’s shoulder getting hurt again?
Patriots win.

Bronco’s/Bills
Could Denver be snake bitten? They will certainly miss Jake Plummer. The Bills, who may just win a game or two if they would quit circling the wagons and try to get in the endzone instead.
Bronco’s win

Saints/Colts
Peyton Manning. Get used to seeing this name and his face more often than last year. If that’s possible. Saints have Brees, and Bush and they’re own Peyton. Not Eli, but Sean.
The upset special. Saints win.

Lions/Raiders
Yes, the Lions selected another wide receiver with their number one draft choice. How’s that been working out for ya Detroit? Speaking of draft signings. The Raiders #1 draft pick, J. Russell is still holding out. For what? Who knows and who cares at this point. Daunte Culpepper knew that the Raiders are the team for him. And he gets to prove it Sunday.
Raiders win.

Dolphins/Redskins
Wake up Trent! You must still be dizzy wanting to go Miami, a team that has chewed through quarterbacks since Dan Marino departed faster than Terrel Owens mouth on the sidelines during a blowout. Redskins owner Snyder feels another 300 million dollars is needed for the team to be competitive.
Redskins win.

Cardinals/49er’s
Denny Who? Seriously though, (No wait, can’t be serious about the Cards) Alex Smith is no Joe Montana, not even John Brodie, but good enough to win.
49er’s win.

Giants/Cowboys
Eli’s coming! Three Dog Night made that song popular back in the 1970’s. Giants are still waiting for the coming out parade. Romo to Owens. Doesn’t have the same ring as Aikman to Irvin. Strahan needs the money to fill the gap between his teeth.
Giants win.

Steelers/Browns
Mike Tomlin, new head coach for the Steelers gets his first game against arch rival Cleveland. Cleveland decides on Frye at QB. I can hear Manfred Mann warming up already with his light rendition of the Mighty Quinn.
Steelers win.

Chiefs/Texans
How’s Mario Williams working out for ya Texas? Huard the QB for the Chiefs. Johnson deems himself ready and fan worthy. Where’s Hank stram and the power P trap play when you need him?
Texans win.

Panthers/Rams
Carr will replace Dellhome by mid-season. Deangelo Williams not what they thought. Issac Bruce and Holt still hanging.
Rams win.

Buccaneers/Seahawks
A tearful Alstott retires. Bucs have 11 QB’s on their roster. None of them are starter material. Hasselbeck is a crybaby, but with Alexander pounding away, the tears slow.
Seahawks win.

Bears/Chargers
Thank Christ Rex Grossman is still at the helm of the Bears. Otherwise, the team would be unbeatable. No more Marty ball for the Chargers. Tomlinson had a productive preseason didn’t he? Didn’t need it though.
Chargers win.

Titans/Jaguars
Vince Young made believers out of everyone last season. Pacman is still running. Leftwich is gone and Gerrard is in for the Jags. Yea, that oughta straighen out the poor play at the QB position.
Titans win.

Ravens/Bengals
Billick is an offensive genius. Or so he says. Bengals need early wins before half the team winds up in the pokey. (And I don’t mean Gumby you dirty minded people) Palmer is poised to lead the team to the big house, err, big game.
Bengals win.

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One Response to “Week 1 Winners And Losers”

  1. LOTGK said

    Bears4Life – Posted 9/6/2007
    Bears will beat the Chargers. Grossman will surprise everyone in the league this season. He will be an all pro. Super bowl bound for Da Bears!

    LOTGK – Posted 9/6/2007
    Although I like your entusiasm, I can not see Rex as an all pro QB for this year. Adequate at best. All pro. Not likely.

    LOTGK – Posted 9/7/2007
    Colts 41, Saints 10

    LOTGK – Posted 9/9/2007
    Update: 12:47pm Sunday the 9th.
    Vikings to record 5 sacks today, Peterson to break a long run 30 plus yards for a TD.

    LOTGK – Posted 9/10/2007
    I was wrong. The Vikings had six sacks. And Peterson broke a 60 yarder for a TD, not a 30 yarder.

    LOTGK – Posted 9/11/2007
    Let’s look at the results. 11-5 and losing the upset special.

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