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Posts Tagged ‘brad childress’

The Prodigal Son Returns

Posted by LOTGK on October 6, 2010

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I'm Back In The Saddle

Randy Moss, the prodigal son, after years of squandering his talent, has returned home to Minnesota.
Randy said to Brad, Coach, I have sinned against the league and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called a Viking.

But Brad said to his coaches, Quickly! Bring me the best robe and put it on Randy. Put a ball in his hand and cleats on his feet. Open the cafeteria and bring the best food. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this player of mine was dead and is alive again. He was lost and is now found.

The Holy Gospel according to Coach Childress. Amen.

Yes Viking fans, Moss is back in town. Brett Favre again has a deep threat target to stretch the field. To lesson the blitz, to eliminate 8 and 9 men in the box to slow Peterson, to catch touchdowns, to win games, to beat the Jets, and win the ring he so dearly covets.

And his return is none to soon. The Vikings are 1-2 and are facing a brutal remaining schedule and will need the offense at peak operating performance to advance to the playoffs. Moss will still command a double team opening up opportunities for Harvin, Berrian, and Shaincoe. It will also leave one or more men out of the box helping Peterson to gain even more yards. Fewer men in the box, less blitzes on Favre, more time to throw, more time to read the defense. The whole team wins.

And one more thing to ponder before I end this post with an old Lorne Greene song, If Moss signs for three more years and clicks with Brett Favre, does this entice Favre to return for three more years. After all, there is only one more record that he doesn’t have. Most seasons played, held by former Raider quarterback, George Blanda, 26 seasons.

With Randy’s return, lets face, his reputation was tarnished leaving and dying in the black hole known as Oakland. Moving to New England, he set individual records and flirted with a perfect season and super bowl victory. Returning home, hopefully, he has the same mentality he had as a rookie wanting to tear up the league. Moss scores a TD Monday night. Perhaps Favre’s 500th TD pass.

The following lyrics is a remix of Lorne Greene’s famous cowboy song titled Ringo.

He lay face down in the Oakland sand
Clutching a football in his hand.
Left behind his career was dead
But under his heart was an ounce of dread.
But a spark still burned so I used my knife
And late that night I saved the life, of Randy.
Randy… Randy…

I Coached him till the danger past
The days went by, he learned so fast.
Then from dawn to setting sun
He practiced on his deadly run.
And hour and hour I watched in awe
No human being could match the draw, of Randy.
Randy…. Randy.

One day we rode the mountain crest
And he went East and I went West.
I went to Dallas and wore a star
While he spread terror near and far.
With speed and leaps he gained such fame
All through the league they feared the name, of Randy.
Randy…. Randy.

I knew some day I’d face the test
Which one of us would be the best.
And sure enough the word came down
That he was playing in my town.
I left the team out in the street
And I went in alone to meet, Randy.
Randy…. Randy.

They said my speed was next to none
But my lightning peddle had just begun.
When I felt a hit that stung my wrist
The ball went flying by my wrist.
And I was looking down the bore
Of the deadly 84, of Randy.
Randy… Randy.

They say that was the only time
That anyone had seen him smile.
He slowly lowered his hand and then
He said, we’re even friend.
And so at last I understood
That there was still a spark of good, in Randy.
Randy…. Randy..

I blocked the path of his retreat,
He turned and stepped not missing a beat.
A million New England fans were jaded
A moment later, he was traded.
The Vikes began to shoot and cheer
No one in Boston shed a tear, for Ringo.
Randy… Randy.

The story spread throughout the land
That I had beaten Randy’s hand.
And it was just the years they say
That made me put my cleats away.
But on game day they can’t explain
The tarnished star above the name, of Randy.
Randy… Randy.

SKOL VIKINGS!

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Vikings Zygi Wilf – Whatever It Takes

Posted by LOTGK on August 20, 2010

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Zygi Wilf - Stayin Alive

All day long, wearing a mask of false bravado
Trying to keep up the smile that hides a tear
But as the sun goes down,
I get that empty feeling again
How I wish to God that you were here

Brett come back, any kind of fool could see
There was something in everything about you
Brett come back, you can blame it all on me
I was wrong, and I just can’t live without you

Guess who’s Back In Town?
Yes Viking fans, just as Viking Thunder predicted back on January 2nd, 2010, Brett Favre is back in purple ready to lead the team to the promised land. What, you don’t believe me? Then check this link, (Grassy Knoll Institute 50 Bold predictions For 2010) read prediction number 13, and then return back. Go ahead, I’ll wait. See, I told you so.

So Brett is back in town after snagging a ride on the Viking company jet with the help of three Viking players that traveled to Mississippi to bring Brett home to the Dome. Favre announced that he owed the Viking organization one more season and that he would suit up and play. He stated he hoped his ankle was healed enough to take the beating of an entire season. But hey, Brett never missed a game in his career. And this is his 20th season so no worries right?

What, Me Retire?

Alas, there is trouble in Purple Town. The same day Favre returned, a report leaked out that Favre and several of the offensive players did not respect coach Brad Childress. (Perhaps it’s from the same unknown source that had Favre texting that he was retiring) The chum is in the water and the sharks smell blood.

As Chief Brody lamented in the movie Jaws, “We need a bigger boat,” the Vikings have bigger fish to fry. Sidney Rice is still hobbled nursing a hip injury. Adrian Peterson hasn’t put in a strong training camp nursing an injury as well. (Hey Adrian, a bruised ego doesn’t cut it as a legitimate injury) V. Shaincoe is also out. And Percy Harvin has been absent almost the entire training camp due to a death in the family and recurring migraine headache attacks. Just yesterday, Harvin had to be taken off the field by ambulance as he collapsed on the field.

What the Hell is happening in Purple Town?

September 9th is right around the corner and the Vikings travel back to the place they lost the championship game. Back to the place where several players, (Sharper) predicted more pain and late hits on Favre. Back to the place where Favre threw his last pass in his illustrious career. There will be blood! Bad blood. On both sides. The referee’s will be tossing hankies all evening. Are the Vikings prepared for this onslaught against the Super Bowl champions? Let’s have a look-see.

Last week, the Vikings traveled to St. Louis for their first pre-season contest. The Rams looked exactly like they did last year. A 1-15 team with a lot of expensive high draft picks. Tavaris Jackson played sparingly but Sage Rosenfels had significant play time. He passed for over 300 yards, 3 touchdowns, zero interceptions, and over 70 percent completion percentage. However, it was against the Rams.

The defense stymied Sam Bradford, the #1 over all pick in the draft as well as the rest of the offense. If not for the 93 yard punt return, the Rams would have been shut out.

Speaking of the 93 yard punt return! WTF Childress! The Vikings year in and year out have the worst special teams in the NFL. Period! Keep this in mind when you take the field in-game one and kick or punt to Reggie (Kim Kardashian’s ass wasn’t good enough for me) Bush.

Toby Gerheart, All State insurance should be contacting you for commercial spots. You got good hands dude.

The defensive line is the best in the league. I said it and I meant it. From the starting four to the depth, the D-Line is the best you can get.

Brett Favre is back in town, and the circus media have erected their big top tents have more than a one trick pony to report on these days. Not just Brett Favre returning, but the news leak of players not respecting Childress, Peterson feeling slighted, Harvin and his migraines, Twitter wars between the Saints and Vikings players each predicting pain for their opponents, and of course the stadium issue.
God Damn It! We need a bigger boat!

SKOL VIKINGS!

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Frantic 911 Call

Posted by LOTGK on August 4, 2010

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And So It Begins

Minneapolis 911 Call Center: (Phone Ringing)
911 Operator: Minnesota 911 Emergency Center, what is your emergency?
Frantic Caller: Help me please. I’m being held hostage against my will!
911 Operator: Sir, that is what ‘Hostage” means.
Frantic Caller: No, I mean an anonymous phone text was just aired all over the sports networks claiming that Brett Favre may or may not have called it quits.
911 Operator: (To her supervisor) Chief, we have another Brett Favre situation on our hands.
Chief: Damn that Favre. Damn him all to Hell. We don’t have the resources to respond to the amount of calls this Jackass generates.
911 Operator: Err, Chief. The caller, he can hear you!
Chief: Yes, right then. Tell the caller that Brett Favre will return to the Vikings after the heavy lifting of training camp is complete and that he will play this season, no matter what any network bobble head reports.
Frantic Caller: Yes, I heard. Thank the Lord.

This Sunday, the traditional NFL Hall Of Fame football game kickoffs in Canton, Ohio. Coincidence that the ultimate media whore, Brett Favre, like the swallows returning to Capistrano every year, is once again entrenched in retirement controversy. I think not.

Here’s the skinny Viking fans: A bobble head reporter announced that Brett Favre is retiring. How did this bobble head know this information? Because of a Phantom text message Favre supposedly sent to several Viking team mates saying, “This is it!”

Perhaps this text was completely taken out of context. What if Favre was sending Jenn Sterger a picture of his penis with the title header, “This is it!” See how a simple text message can be misconstrued? I thought so!

Note to Brett.
It’s OK. We understand what you’re doing. You want to play another season for the Vikings but you don’t want to go through the grueling training camp. How do you do this without looking like a douche bag to your team mates? Use your ankle injury as a cover story. Announce that it is not yet 100% and you won’t make that decision until it is. And that should be right around August 25th, just a few days before the third pre-season game.

Side Note: I believe Childress and Favre have a gentlemen’s agreement this season. Favre will come to camp at the end of August and resume his position as starter. Otherwise, Childress would have certainly pursued McNabb or one of the high profile rookie quarterbacks in the draft. The Jackson and Rosenfels experiment is over. Mark my words Viking fans. Tim Tebow will be a star in three years.

Contrary to popular belief, there are other players on the Vikings, and one of them has an expanding ego problem. Can you guess who I’m referring to? Go ahead, think a moment or two. (Tick-Tock) It’s Adrian Peterson! After the Favre retirement story broke, Peterson was interviewed not concerning his play, his knee, or his propensity to fumble, but who he wanted to quarterback the Vikings.

You could tell Peterson was ticked at that line of questioning. It made him out to be just another player on the team, just another running back worshiping at the Favre altar. Peterson retorted something to the effect, “Who do I want handing me the ball. Favre of course.” Peterson also added this ego boost by saying, (Paraphrase) That’s like if I decided to say, I’m done playing. Of course the team would have a better chance at winning if they had me on the team. But I want to stay focused on camp.

Where’s my phone, I have a 911 call to make…..

SKOL VIKINGS!

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Vikings Release Brett Favre

Posted by LOTGK on April 1, 2010

Its Good To Be The Quarterback

The Minnesota Vikings, in a two pronged attempt to boost sagging season ticket sales and apply pressure on the legislature for a new stadium, released Brett Favre from his contract. Owner Zygi Wilf and head coach Brad Childress both stated that the window of opportunity for the Superbowl is closing and that every team member had to be on board by the start of mini camp for that to become a reality.

In Favre’s place, the Vikings signed a relatively unknown free agent from Atlanta Georgia. Her forty time is slow but she has plenty of wiggle. Her arm strength is weak but her form is perfect and solid. She is certainly to be a favorite inside the locker room.

Sports analysts believe this is a ploy to force Favre into making a decision sooner rather than later about his retirement. Favre was quoted as saying that he would come back for ten more seasons if his center looked that good.

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Vikings Lose To Saints 31-28 In Championship Game

Posted by LOTGK on January 26, 2010

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I Did It My Way

And now the end is here
And so I face the final curtain
My friend, I’ll say it clear
I’ll state my case of which I’m certain
I’ve lived a life that’s full
I traveled each and every highway
And more, much more than this
I did it my way

Brett Favre left his heart and part of his kidney out on the field last night in his valiant effort to advance to the Super Bowl. Alas, Nostradamus must have had a snootful when he made his Viking prediction 500 years ago. As of this exact moment, Brett Favre is on the Will I or won’t I retire clock. I hope he comes back for one more year. What else are the Vikings going to do? Give Jackson or Sage the nod!

Last night’s game, the NFC Championship, was won by the New Orleans saints by a score of 31-28 in overtime. Drew Brees, the best passer in the NFL was held in check passing for under 200 yards. Well under his average. The entire stable of Saints running backs were held to a mere 68 yards rushing. Henderson was the leading receiver with a paltry 39 yards receiving. The Saints had half as many first downs as the Vikings, 218 less yards than the Vikings, less time of possession than the Vikings, less sacks than the Vikings, 27 less plays than the Vikings, less completions than the Vikings, and one more thing, less men in the huddle than the Vikings. Congratulations go to the Saints for winning the game even with playing so poorly.

Speaking of 12 men in the huddle. WTF was Childress thinking? It’s third down and 15, the Vikings are looking at a 56 yard field goal at this point, a time out was called and Favre went to the sideline to discuss the perfect play for such a scenario. How about, let Chester Taylor take it up the middle following his full back and behind the 700 plus all pro guard and tackle. Hope he makes a few yards and centers the field goal attempt. Call time out with 5 seconds to go and line up for a 54 yard field goal. Either win the game or go into overtime. Instead, A pass play was called and Favre threw a pick. Almost as bad as Denny Green taking the knee in the championship game of 1999.

Moving on to Adrian Peterson. One of the most talented running backs in the NFL. Alas, his legacy will be associated with fumbles. I’m not laying blame to the loss of the game squarely on Peterson, but he did help out. As he did against the Bears a few weeks earlier fumbling the ball in overtime allowing Bears to score and win. Perhaps if Peterson didn’t fumble, last nights game would have been played in a different dome.

I’m angry at Peterson. Not for his fumbles last night, but how he acted on the sidelines afterward. He was smiling and laughing like the Vikings just won the game. You fumbled the damn ball! The running back coach should have had your ass firmly planted on the bench reading you the riot act. You have had three years in the league to correct your fumbling. Either you are unwilling to accept instruction or the coach is sub par.

Sour Grapes Section:
Depending on one’s perspective, the referee’s either called a horrible game or a flawless game last night. I believe there were some questionable calls, especially the so-called first down rush by the Saints in overtime on fourth down. The runner’s helmet extended past the first down marker, but he fumbled the ball allowing it to slip down to his knees. Thus, short of the first down. Vikings ball at their 38 yard line. In great position to win.

Don’t let anyone say that the referee’s favor Brett Favre. He was mugged 9 times last night yet the yellow flags never hit the ground. Some were blatantly late hits. One was a blatant Hi-Low hit.

However, the season is now over. And a good season it was.
Sidney Rice emerged as an all pro receiving threat. Something the Vikings hadn’t enjoyed since a former team member wearing #84.
Percy Harvin is the real deal. Falling to #22 was the best gift the Vikings received since a former team member that used to wear #84.
Visanthe Shiancoe continues his progress towards a dominate tight end.
The Vikings won two more regular season games than last year and won a playoff game. There is progression there. How much of the success was the Favre factor will be hotly debated until the team lines up in September later this year. IF Favre retires yet again, the Vikings are back to Sage and Tarvaris. Does anyone really believe they will have the success Favre did? Didn’t think so.

That leaves us with a cloudy future.
First, The Stadium Update. Only 10 more games left at the Metrodome until the lease is over. No stadium is in the wings, nothing is being discussed about a new site, not even a glimmer of hope for a new stadium in Minnesota. As I stated a year ago, the Vikings are a potential team to move to the new stadium in City Of Industry, California.

Second, Brad Childress. He just signed a contract extension and will be running his Kick-Ass-Offense for the foreseeable future. What are his plans to replace Favre? Rely on the draft or go to the bench for Rosenfels and Jackson. Either way, it will be a step backward.

Third, Adrian Peterson. Someone needs to teach him how to hold on to the football. Maybe Keyshawn Johnson can write a sequel to his controversial book, Just throw Me The Damn Ball and title it, Just Hold Onto The Damn Ball. If his fumbling is not corrected, he will become a detriment to the team.

Fourth, the draft. Hopefully Favre will decide rather quickly his retirement status. if he says he is retiring, Childress may want to search a replacement via the draft. Clausen, Bradford and McCoy should be off the board when its the Vikings turn at 29, but what about Tim Tebow? Is he the next Ben Rothleisberger? All Tebow does is win!

Fifth, free agency. It’s a no cap year and the eligible players will be looking to break the bank. Can the Vikings afford to sign big name stars? Perhaps instead, they will pursue second level talent, like Brady Quinn, who the Vikings were thinking about three years ago when they selected Peterson instead. one thing is for sure. The Vikings need a quarterback not named Sage or Tarvaris.

Lastly, this season passed by in the wink of an eye. Perhaps all the hoopla, (Yes, I said hoopla) surrounding Favre made it seem the season to be set on fast forward. Now as Groundhog day rapidly approaches, one can only speculate whether Brett Favre sees his shadow and declares six more weeks of speculation.

We were close this year Viking fans. We were close.

See you in a few weeks when free agency season opens.

SKOL VIKINGS!

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