Grassy Knoll Institute

Home Of The 99 Cent Conspiracy Theory




  • Kennedy Assassination, Flu Shot Virus, Big Foot, Lochness Monster, Beatles Hoax, Michael Jackson, Princess Diana, Moon landing, and many more.

    Conspiracy Archives




  • We visit all the "Greasy Spoon" restaurants around the country rating each experience. Featuring Las Vegas, Chicago, San Francisco, Gatlinburg, Houston, New York, Youngstown.

    Blue Plate Special




  • 1960's Catholic grade school with mean Nuns as teachers was a recipe of pure Hell. I knew my mission in life the day I pulled Sister Ann Teresa’s habit off her head. I had to know what secret treasures lay hidden beneath.

    Catholic Nuns




  • Sexy Giant Aliens are roaming the Earth plotting to enslave humanity. View photographic proof Giant Aliens have already infiltrated the population.

    Giant Alien Invasion




  • We pay homage to the sexy actresses and their cleavage who starred in science fiction movies and television series.

    Sci-Fi Sexy Sirens




  • The Thought Screen Helmet is the only defense against alien abduction. It disrupts the telepathic link between wearer and alien to eliminate contact.

    Thought Screen Helmet




  • The LOTGK logo can be found all over the world. Even on a sexy girls ass.

    Find The Logo




  • Humorous personal life stories of the past, present, and future from a 50 plus year old who has seen everything. Almost!

    Inner Sanctum




  • Random tidbits of worthy news and photographs that don’t quite fit into any of the Grassy Knoll Institutes categories.

    Random Shots




  • Sometimes a picture is worth a thousands words. If they were only worth money!

    Postcards Edge




  • Rantings of a mad die hard Viking fan. No purple colored glasses for this fan.

    Viking thunder Rant




  • Classic vinyl record albums rescued from my basement. See what you have been missing.

    Classic Vinyl Records




  • Once a thriving vacation resort and young adult get-a-way spot, has succumbed to erosion. From the once beautiful beach to the town and businesses that dot the once vibrant strip.

    Geneva On The Lake




  • Brutal clips of faces of death, reckless driving, experiments documented, grass growing, public hangings, live executions, and clips of UFO’s flying above.

    Video Vault




  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

    Join 86 other followers




  • Grassy Knoll Institute. Home of the 99 cent conspiracy theory. We keep overhead and expenses low to provide more affordable and better tasting conspiracy theories for our readers. Hurry, supplies are limited at these prices. And quit calling me Shirley.
  • Random Hits

    • 4,544,725 Satisfied Surfers Since 10/06/2007
  • Current Hot Stories

  • Blogs I Follow

    1. lotgk.blogspot.com
    2. Sladewilson: The War Journal Vol. 2
    3. Doooh Head
    4. ben
    5. Ahrcanum
    6. Grassy Knoll Institute
  • Community

  • Time Travel

Frantic 911 Call

Posted by LOTGK on August 4, 2010

vikings saints preview

And So It Begins

Minneapolis 911 Call Center: (Phone Ringing)
911 Operator: Minnesota 911 Emergency Center, what is your emergency?
Frantic Caller: Help me please. I’m being held hostage against my will!
911 Operator: Sir, that is what ‘Hostage” means.
Frantic Caller: No, I mean an anonymous phone text was just aired all over the sports networks claiming that Brett Favre may or may not have called it quits.
911 Operator: (To her supervisor) Chief, we have another Brett Favre situation on our hands.
Chief: Damn that Favre. Damn him all to Hell. We don’t have the resources to respond to the amount of calls this Jackass generates.
911 Operator: Err, Chief. The caller, he can hear you!
Chief: Yes, right then. Tell the caller that Brett Favre will return to the Vikings after the heavy lifting of training camp is complete and that he will play this season, no matter what any network bobble head reports.
Frantic Caller: Yes, I heard. Thank the Lord.

This Sunday, the traditional NFL Hall Of Fame football game kickoffs in Canton, Ohio. Coincidence that the ultimate media whore, Brett Favre, like the swallows returning to Capistrano every year, is once again entrenched in retirement controversy. I think not.

Here’s the skinny Viking fans: A bobble head reporter announced that Brett Favre is retiring. How did this bobble head know this information? Because of a Phantom text message Favre supposedly sent to several Viking team mates saying, “This is it!”

Perhaps this text was completely taken out of context. What if Favre was sending Jenn Sterger a picture of his penis with the title header, “This is it!” See how a simple text message can be misconstrued? I thought so!

Note to Brett.
It’s OK. We understand what you’re doing. You want to play another season for the Vikings but you don’t want to go through the grueling training camp. How do you do this without looking like a douche bag to your team mates? Use your ankle injury as a cover story. Announce that it is not yet 100% and you won’t make that decision until it is. And that should be right around August 25th, just a few days before the third pre-season game.

Side Note: I believe Childress and Favre have a gentlemen’s agreement this season. Favre will come to camp at the end of August and resume his position as starter. Otherwise, Childress would have certainly pursued McNabb or one of the high profile rookie quarterbacks in the draft. The Jackson and Rosenfels experiment is over. Mark my words Viking fans. Tim Tebow will be a star in three years.

Contrary to popular belief, there are other players on the Vikings, and one of them has an expanding ego problem. Can you guess who I’m referring to? Go ahead, think a moment or two. (Tick-Tock) It’s Adrian Peterson! After the Favre retirement story broke, Peterson was interviewed not concerning his play, his knee, or his propensity to fumble, but who he wanted to quarterback the Vikings.

You could tell Peterson was ticked at that line of questioning. It made him out to be just another player on the team, just another running back worshiping at the Favre altar. Peterson retorted something to the effect, “Who do I want handing me the ball. Favre of course.” Peterson also added this ego boost by saying, (Paraphrase) That’s like if I decided to say, I’m done playing. Of course the team would have a better chance at winning if they had me on the team. But I want to stay focused on camp.

Where’s my phone, I have a 911 call to make…..

SKOL VIKINGS!

minnesota vikings icon

Back To Viking Thunder Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Share

4 Responses to “Frantic 911 Call”

  1. Max Jackl said

    What a Dick!

  2. Gumby said

    Favre is coming back. Like you said, if Childress had a thought he wouldn’t, he would have went after McCoy or Tebow, instead of Joe Webb. And i agree with Max, what a dick.

Leave a Reply: And your argument is

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 

Home Of The 99 Cent Conspiracy Theory

Sladewilson: The War Journal Vol. 2

Entertainment Reviews - Video Games, Music, Television, Movies for the urban warrior... Adult Themes. Parential discretion advised...

Doooh Head

\"They all say Doooh\"

Ahrcanum

Conspiracy, HAARP, Earthquakes, Volcano's, Weather Modification, H1N1, Swine Flu, NWO, Politics, and other hedonistic topical articles from The CEO & Czar of The Committee In My Head. Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

Grassy Knoll Institute

Home Of The 99 Cent Conspiracy Theory

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 86 other followers