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Unknown Thought Screen Helmet Wearer
Posted by LOTGK on April 10, 2010
Unknown Abductee
Hi, my name is Bobby Smith and I’ve been an alien abductee in the Philadelphia, Pennsylvania area since 1996. For over 10 years I have been abducted by aliens 17 times. In late 2006 while surfing the Internet for alien abductions, I came across the Grassy Knoll Institute, the utmost authority on alien abductions. I learned about the Thought screen Helmet and how it prevented alien abductions by severing the telepathic link the aliens had over me.
In no time at all I was able to construct my own Thought Screen Helmet lined with velostat, a material that has electrical properties that cancels telepathic rays. Ever since I’ve been wearing my (TSH) I have not been abducted by aliens.
Thank you Grassy Knoll Institute for giving me my life back. I am now a productive member of society again. I can maintain my job and I have found romance once again. Hopefully all the other unknown alien abductee’s can share in my success story and return to living a meaningful life in society.
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LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL
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490R said
If you wear the helmet, you have to hide it with the bag over your head. hahaha
LOTGK said
Also explains their sexual habits as well.
Gabby said
The epitome of a two bagger. I feel sorry for those afflicted with this disease.
Anti-christ said
Thats me under the bag, when the time is right, and its soon, I will reveal myself to the world.
LOTGK said
You aren’t Chuck Barris are you?
Max Jackl said
The unknown comic was pretty funny on the Gong Show. And now, an alien abductee. How sad.
LOTGK said
On the bright side, life can only get better from here.