Elephant Ear Restaurant

Fair Food Without The Fair

It’s the end of September and the local and state fairs are now just a recent memory. Some wishing they would have bought that giant Elephant Ear or hot sausage sandwich smothered in peppers and onions.

As if my prayers had a direct hot line to the big guy, a new restaurant popped up in my old town called the Elephant Ear. The menu was simple and ingenious. All your fair food favorites.

We pulled in and the place was packed. There was one parking spot left out of about 25 in the lot. It must be good if the place is packed right?

Fair Corn Dogs

The layout was simple. A small sit down area with a few booths and tables, maybe seating for 25-30 people. An order and pickup counter on the left side. We waited in line for our turn. We waited about 5 minutes to place our order. After we placed our order, it took almost 20 minutes for our order to come up. That is why the place was packed. The food preparation was very slow. We noticed that everyone sitting at the tables and booths were waiting for orders.

Finally, our number was called and I retrieved our order. Of course I had to order a corn dog. It was standard fare, (Fair) and standard size. It was cooked well and tasted good. I have to say, it tasted just like the Canfield Fair corn dogs. And at $2.75 it better.

Cheeseburger & Fair Fries

The second part of my artery clogging dinner was a cheeseburger and original “Fair” french fries. The cheeseburger was nothing special, no outstanding qualities. The bun was a little beat up, and it looked like it was just tossed in the container. It was well cooked, the cheese melted, the beef adequate quality.

The fries, on the other hand, were not “Fair” quality. In fact, they were pretty horrendous. Perhaps if they were cooked properly, they would have tasted better. They had the texture of fat spaghetti strings. They were soggy, wet, greasy, and well, terrible. The cost was $6 dollars for the combo which was reasonable if the fries were edible.

So, the service was terrible, the food below average, and the price adequate. However, I have to commend the owners for the unique idea of Fair food without all the stinky animals and smelly pumpkins and rotting hay. Since the restaurant was still new, I have decided to give them one more chance to redeem themselves. With that…..

The Grassy Knoll Institute scores 2.5 out of 5 shots and is on the fence about recommending Elephant Ear Restaurant for dinner.

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Jack Kennedy Kicks Back In Shades

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John F. Kennedy enjoys an anecote from one of his admirers during an afternoon at the ballpark.

Number 70 in a series of 77 John F. Kennedy cards.

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Lost Update – Flash Forward 2:17

Lost Update – Summer Of Lost – 09/28/2009

Virtual Reality Tours Now Available

Last week ABC rolled out their new television program, Flash Forward, the replacement for the highly successful program Lost. To pay homage to the critically acclaimed show, an Oceanic airlines billboard was visible at the beginning of the program. As we all know, Oceanic Flight 815 was the doomed plane that sent the passengers to the Lost island to fight for their very lives.

Lost is beginning it’s sixth and final season in early 2010 and the finale will be a massive surprise to all those except the readers of the Grassy Knoll Institute.

Just what is the Grassy Knoll Institutes Lost theory….I’ve been waiting 2 minutes and 17 seconds to tell you…..
Although it appears the survivors of Oceanic flight 815 are on a tropical island, they are being deceived. There is no island. The survivors are in a virtual reality laboratory. All the castaways are interconnected to one another sharing each others thoughts, memories, and feelings. While in this virtual reality laboratory, a battery of physical and mental experiments are performed on them. And who is running these experiments? As Juliet stated, the Aliens of course.

Perhaps It's Jacobs Watch

What does the Grassy Knoll Institute believe Flash Forward to be about……
Don’t worry my dear readers. I would never inflict the same pain upon you as I have done the past 5 plus years with Lost.

However, a Twilight Zone episode titled, A Kind Of A Stopwatch, fits the bill and explains the Flash Forward pilot. A Kind Of Stop Watch, (Original airdate: 10/18/1963, episode #124) was about a man that happened upon a magic stopwatch, that whenever he stopped the watch, all time itself stopped as well. All the people, animals, time itself coming to a halt. Except for him. He was able to move around and manipulate whatever he wanted without anyone seeing him. (Rob banks, skip out of restaurants, never wait in lines)

The Flash Forward pilot began with everyone loosing consciousness for 2 minutes and 17 seconds. Planes crashed, (Maybe Oceanic Flight 815 was included) cars collided, people drowned. This lapse of time was a world wide event. Every city, every country reported the exact phenomenon at the same time. And many people claimed they saw the future, April 29th, 2010, and glimpses of events unfolding on that day.

The pilot ended with the two FBI agents viewing video tape from a baseball game in New York. One person was moving, walking down the aisle and into the tunnel. Who is that man?

In the Twilight Zone episode, the man broke the watch while time was halted, leaving him alone in the world for all eternity. For Flash Forward, there will be some sort of device that can alter and stop time.

Submitted for your approval, or at least your analysis…..

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Vikings Defeat 49ers 27-24 September 27th 2009

$12 Million Dollar Man

Coach Brad Childress hitched his wagon up to the Brett Favre non-retirement circus this season. Thousands of people reminded Childress of P.T. Barnums famous caveat, “There’s a sucker born every minute!” How befitting that Favre would bring the Vikings from behind driving the team 80 yards to score a TD on a strike to Greg Lewis under the big top Thunderdome.

Brett Favre, with 1:29 left on the clock, down by four points, with no time outs, at their own 20 yard line, piloted the Minnesota Vikings the length of the field tossing the winning touchdown to recently signed receiver Greg Lewis with two seconds remaining on the clock. With that drive, the Vikings remain unbeaten at 3-0 wining the game 27-24 as the Favre mystique continues.

Staying with the high wire circus atmosphere, the Vikings special teams keep the fans on pins and needles. Case in point, the Vikings are in the lead, 13-7 with a few seconds left at halftime. The Vikings line up for 50 plus yard field goal. You guessed it, the kick gets block and returned for a touchdown. That is the second touchdown given up by the vikings so far this season. I say so far because the Vikings are notoriously horrid on special teams allowing an NFL high 7 special teams touchdowns last year.

101 Yard Kickoff Return

And then there is Percy Harvin, the rookie sensation from Florida. The Vikings number one draft pick this year, has not disappointed. Today, he returned a kickoff for 101 yards for a score plus hauled in four passes for 51 yards. Harvin has three touchdowns in three games this season. Known for his speed and running in space, Harvin has soft hands and finishes his runs fighting for every yard he can get. I stated last week that Percy Harvin would be the rookie of the year. Today’s performance only solidified my stance.

The Viking defense was geared up to stop 49er back Frank Gore but after his first carry, he was done for the game twisting his ankle. The defense stuffed the 49ers allowing only 58 yards on the ground and only 188 net passing yards. Even more impressive, the 49ers did not convert a single third down Sunday. They were 0 for 11. This was a severe weakness and concern for the Viking defense. Today, they got off the field when they needed to.

Don’t worry, I didn’t forget about the best running back in the league. Adrian Peterson rushed for 85 yards on 19 carries. He has 357 yards so far this year. He is on pace for 1900 yards rushing.

Penalties are still a major concern. Vikings were called for 9 penalties on Sunday. Coach Childress, for all his talk about discipline, the Vikings continue to rack up the penalties.

Guess who’s coming to dinner next week? Under the big top! Monday Night Football! National audience! The ultimate game for whore media hounds. Know anyone who fits this description? The green bay Packers, 2-1 come in to Minnesota to face not only their arch NFC North rivals, but their former all pro quarterback. This match-up is a game of interest not just because the Favre variable, but because of the ramifications it has so early in the season.

If the Vikings win, they will be in first place in the division, have a two game lead over the Packers, plus two wins in the division already. If the Packers win, they will be ahead of the Vikings in the division with a home game at Lambeau in November. I can hear the media trucks already setting up for this Monday night showdown.

SKOL VIKINGS!

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