Vikings Sign Kim Kardashian

The hype, hope, and hysterics of the 2008 NFL draft is now complete. Like myself, many thousands of rabid fans were incensed at the player their team selected, or did not select. Luckily, we didn’t muff up our first round selection giving even more fodder to the ESPN vampires.

The Vikings, before the draft, traded their #1 pick and two #3 round picks to the Chiefs for the rights to Jared Allen, defensive end. Allen fills a need at that position the Vikings have been searching for ever since Chris Doleman retired in 1999.

So far so good right? Bare with me folks. We’ll get back to the draft in just a few.

A Little 2007 Viking History:
The last we saw the Vikings, they ended their season 8-8, a two game improvement from the year before. Under coach Brad Childress the Vikings are 14-18 with zero playoff appearances. Some experts say year three is the magical number not only for players, but coaches as well. Brad Childress, you are now officially on the clock and the hot seat.

Entering the 2008 free agent signing period, the Vikings had several glaring needs and with a more than adequate cap number, had the money to pursue the players they needed. The Vikings needed help at DE, WR, QB, Safey, and OL. Ironically, it is the same needs as last year.

Subtraction before addition:
The Vikings Kelly Holcomb found employment elsewhere. I heard KFC needed a night manager in Delaware. Troy Williamson was traded for a 6th round pick ending the Randy Moss comparison forever. Mewelde Moore leaves for his chance to start, and is now relegated to the 3rd string, again! Same as it ever was MM. Dwight Smith won’t be found in a seedy hotel stairwell in Minnesota anymore. Tank Williams, Spencer Johnson, Tony Richardson, and Donatarrius Thomas also moved on to non purple pastures.

Free Agent Additions:
One of the biggest needs for the Vikings was defensive end. Lord knows the Vikings tried to rectify the problem through the draft selecting high first round picks year after year. So far, that plan hasn’t panned out. Our sack leader had a total of 5 last year. That is pathetic!

This year, the Vikings took a different approach. They signed Jared Allen, DE, from the Chiefs. Allen is a dominant DE in the league. He had 15.5 sacks last year. That’s 10 more sacks than our previous leader. Line him up with Pat and Kevin Williams and Ray Edwards and the DL is now a formidable force. Allen will make the entire defense better. Adding more sacks, more QB hurries that make bad throws, less completions, less first downs, less points, less yards, and more interceptions.

The price for Allen was our #1 pick this year, (#17 over all) plus both of our #3 picks this year. Sounds steep until you look at what Jacksonville gave up today for rookie DE Derrick Harvey. Their #1, both #3’s, and a #4 round pick. And Harvey is a rookie who hasn’t played a single down. Jared Allen is a proven all pro and at 26 years old, has plenty of productive years ahead of him.

Another way to look at the cost of Jared Allen is to look at past draft prospects of the Vikings. In the past years, the Vikings signed first round picks E. James, K. Udeze, C. Hovan, D. Underwood, D. Clemons, D. Alexander. Not to mention the many second and third round picks we used to plug the DE spot.

The second glaring weakness is at receiver. Last year the Vikings had Troy Williamson, Robert Furgeson, Bobby Wade, and Sidney Rice as starters. Rice was a rookie and the rest are starters by default. They would be bench warmers on any other team.

The Vikings pulled the trigger early in free agency and signed Bernard Berrian, receiver from Chicago. Berrian had 951 yards and 5 TD’s last year and he was hobbled with an injury. He will be an added bonus this year and a definite upgrade to the receivers.

Safety was also a weakness with D. Smith leaving along with T. Williams and M. Doss. The Vikings dipped into the free agent pool once again and signed Madieu Williams, safety from the Bengals. A vast improvement at safety.

Needing a FB with the departure of T. Richardson, the Vikings signed Thomas Tapeh from the Eagles. He will open plenty of holes for Peterson and Taylor.

Not being done yet, the Vikings signed Maurice Hicks, RB, from the 49ers to replace the departed M. Moore. Hicks will also be featured on special teams and be used as a return man.

The Vikings also added depth at several other positions signing D. Pope, LB, D. Sartz, LB, E. Wyms, DL, K. Allen, DL, M. Boulware, Safety, B. Sapp, CB, and Gus Frerotte, QB.

Before the draft started, the Vikings already had an excellent off-season and filled holes in all their weak positions except QB. Don’t get me wrong, Frerotte is a vast improvement over Holcomb, but there is no one to push incumbent T. Jackson.

The 2008 NFL Viking Draft:
The Vikings only selected five players in the draft.
Second Round: Tyrell Johnson, Safety, Arkansas. Johnson has the height, weight, speed, strength and upside to be a starting safety some day. Hell, Mel Kiper had him as the best safety in the draft. But, this pick was a shock to me. QB Brian Brohm, pegged by experts as the best QB in the draft, and Henne were sitting there in round two and the Vikings passed instead. I’m sure many an ill colored profanities spewed from Viking fans on that pass. Don’t get me wrong, Johnson is a good safety, and will contribute on special teams for the Vikings for several years until Sharper retires, but QB was a much greater need.

In the Fifth round, the Vikings selected Kim Kardashian. Sorry, I mean John David Booty, QB, from USC. Booty comes from a WCO and a major NCAA college playing against some of the best teams and players in the NCAA. Booty (Kardashian) will push T. Jackson in training camp and add immediate competition which is very good for all QB’s concerned. Until Booty was signed, Jackson by default was the starter. He knew Frerotte wouldn’t be the guy, and Bollinger was a severe mistake. Now, Booty, if needed, can come in and play. Yea, I said it, Booty can play.

Staying in the Fifth round, Vikings selected Letroy Guion, DT, Florida State. I believe he is a project. He has the weight, 300 plus, but Viking fans need to pray the Williams brothers don’t get injured.

Round Six brought us John Sullivan, Center, from Notre Dame. Short arms, not a good thing for a center. Sullivan should add depth for the line, but c’mon folks, he is not the replacement for Matt Birk. Chilly, you need to sign Birk to an extension. And soon.

Last pick, still in round Six, Jaymar Johnson, Receiver, from Jackson State. Puzzled here. A. Arrington from Michigan was available at this pick. Johnson has the speed, 4.3 in the forty, average height, and adequate skills. To make the team, he needs to win a spot on special teams.

Viking Thunder Early 2008 Predictions:
Vikings win their division with 11 wins.
Adrian Peterson continues to dominate rushing for 1600 yards and 15 TD’s.
Jared Allen records 13 sacks.
Vikings defense is top 3 over all.
Bernard Berrian makes an impact catching 60 balls and 10 TD’s.
Sidney Rice blossoms and becomes a red zone beast.
Darren Sharper nabs 10 interceptions thanks to the added D line pressure.
Wait a minute. What about TJAX? How does he do? What about Booty? Well, Booty is a 5th round pick. He has to earn a roster spot before he even dreams of starting. Chilly has saddled up with Jackson and how he goes, Chilly goes. Unless Jackson gets injured or plays horribly, and the Vikings slip out of the playoff hunt, Booty will be sitting on his booty this year.

That said. Jackson improves slightly, still stares down receivers, overthrows wide open receivers, and makes the wrong reads. Jackson will not win any games, but will play well enough for the improved defense to carry the team.
Jackson with a 55% completion percentage. Twenty TD passes. 2800 yards passing. 15 interceptions. QB rating 70.5

Until the next update, SKOL Vikings!

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